Respect my authority!
A new milestone was reached today. As the boy was crawling over towards an electrical outlet, I stepped over to intervene. First, I tried diverting his attention.
"Say hey, boy. Look at this hand grenade! Come play with this instead!"
He looked up briefly, with a rather disinterested look on his face. He continued towards the outlet. After a few more unsuccessful attempts to divert his attention, I let out a stern "NO."
Slightly startled, he looked up at me. Then he proceeded to laugh. Not just a smile, not a giggle. He laughed at me.*
I'll give him one free pass. Next time? Military boarding school. You think the drill sergeant is going to put up with that? Me neither.
I bet if I grew a goatee, he'd take me a little more seriously. Too bad I can't.
---
* - Following his fit of laughter, he did in fact turn away from the outlet, most likely in search of some other device with the same level of perceived danger. I picked him up and didn't give him the chance to find anything. He's so dang cute when he laughs, I couldn't resist.
Comments
Cate said:
My 14-month-old nephew frequently disrepects any parental declarations of "No." And laughs. It's an epidemic, I tell ya. My sister has actually threatened to court-martial the kid. But I don't think it's done any good.
mep said:
The only time I told my nephew NO sternly, he was playing with a topiary and taking off the fake fruit and laughing. He looked at me . . . his eyes got REALLY big, his lower lip started to whimper, and then he BURST out crying like I had just run over a puppy.
Nadia said:
Hand grenade? Feh. You'd have been better off throwing flaming spears in his direction. It's so funny watching them dodge about pathetically on their hands and knees trying to avoid a fiery death. Almost as much fun as skinning puppies alive just to hear them squeal*.
See if he finds the time to laugh then.
*This is called a joke, people.
RaJ said:
The world is in a sad, sad state when people feel the need to supply footnotes as disclaimers for skinned-puppy jokes. Are we really that serious minded? I hope not.
Now if the footnote had apologized* for exercising bad judgment or poor taste, that'd be different.
* This also is a joke.
Viking054 said:
I think people took me more seriously when I had a goatee. People are strange like that... Hand grenades mean nothing to them, but a little bit of neanderthal hair growth and they tremble...
jasmine said:
i've seen that boy. i'd be powerless too.
better to just accept your uselessness now, take the defeat like a man.
Lou said:
Reminds me of my times teaching English to preschoolers and elementary school kids in Japan. Telling them "no" or to be quiet (in English)... oh the fun times!
Lou said:
By the way... your poll is missing the option "Medium". That's how I really like my steak. I voted for Medium well, because I find if I order a steak Medium in a restaurant, it always comes Medium rare, and I hate when my steak is still fully pink. So I usually order it Medium well when I eat out.
Sarah said:
wuss!
Scott said:
My nephew looks at you and smiles and shakes his head no every time he does something he knows he shouldn't be doing. Been doing it for a few months now.
Nadia said:
RaJ - I appreciate your footnote. For a moment there I thought you were going all self-righteous on me. Even more so than usual*.
*Joke.
cadiz12 said:
it's bad when they've done something bad but look so freaking cute you can't even be mad. you gotta work on the poker face for that, omar.
i had a friend who taught computers to gradeschoolers and i sat in on his class one day. he was stern with some troublemakers and i was even a little scared. but then later he told me that at that moment he just wanted to pinch the one kid's cheeks. those kids were damn cute, too. but i was biased b/c one of them called me princess.
Syar said:
I've taught my sisters the "times infinity rule" meaning, everytime we argue back and forth i.e :
yeah-huh, nuh-uh, YEAH-HUH!, NUH-UH, you only have to say YEAH-HUH/NUH-UH times infinity, I WIN! So far, I've managed to top this with double infinity, so I always win and they cry when they don't win, which is always. But I worry about the day when they'll look at me and laugh in the face of the sacred infinity rule. then I'm screwed. plus, I'm even more incapable of growing a goatee than you are.
I said:
Whoa, lots of catching up to do.
cate - Good to know that doesn't work, I'll skip that threat and move on to something more severe.
mep - When they start crying, that's when you have to be even tougher. Like me. I've got icewater running through my veins.
nadia - I just ordered some spears on eBay. And some puppies from the local shelter. In 3-5 days, there's going to be some kind of fun going on around here.
RaJ - No footnotes here. I can't wait until those puppies arrive...
viking - Facial hair makes people look tough. I lack that edge. I want to strike fear in people. Instead, they're like "hey, look at those soft, smooth cheeks!"
jasmine - No way man. He won the battle, but I will win the war. Cute smiles or not.
lou - I try to avoid leaving options right in the middle, as I like to polarize people and start fights. Any of you medium rare people wanna fight? Me and lou will meet you at the bike rack, 3pm sharp.
sarah - Again with the compassion. Wait until you have kids. Just wait.
scott - Daggone kids. I love how they acknowledge that they are doing something that they know they shouldn't be doing. While they're doing it.
cadiz - I'll get over it soon, as he continues to do more things that are bad. I won't need a poker face. Just a fake goatee.
syar - Luckily, as the parent, I can just say "because I said so" and have that be the last word.
cadiz12 said:
omar, what makes you cool is your attention to subtleties. i noticed how you changed your afternoon rumble spot to the bike rack instead of the flagpole. personally, that's my favorite venue for kicking ass.
me said:
Ha. I love it when kids laugh when the parents are trying to be serious. Wait until he gets older. Ha.
Berrygirl said:
My son did that too, after awhile he would go to the outlets look at me and tell himself no.
Ant said:
Discussing this today with my colleague who's near the end of his tether. My advice: pick them up and turn them upside down, then put them back down (right-way up)...
Don't know whether it teaches discipline or not but they completely forget what they were doing and stops the immediate crisis...