Four Truths and a Lie
Four of the following stories are actual events from today, January 11, 2006. One's a straight up lie. Can you tell which one is fabricated?
Story 1 - Where I live, the average high on January 11th is 31 degrees Fahrenheit (that seems kind of high to me, but that's per weather.com). Last January was one of the coldest and snowiest on record. Today, it was just shy of 60 degrees and sunny outside, and there's not a flake of snow to be found on my property. I'm pretty sure this means the world is coming to an end. It's better than it ending on a day that's 15 degrees and snowing, I guess.
Story 2 - I went out with the boy this afternoon. On our trip out, he was called a pimp, a player (playa, more specifically), and "the mac" by three separate people. I don't even know why, it's not like he was wearing his gold chains today. And he certainly wasn't reprimanding any prostitutes.
Story 3 - At a stop light, I was waiting directly behind a bus. On the bus were some kids who I visually estimated to be in the 8 to 10 year old range. A girl in the back seat pressed the back of her hand against the back window, and then extended her middle finger. At me. I let out kind of a surprised gasp, then laughed it off, considering that I had probably done worse in my day. She then said something to another little girl in the seat across the aisle from her, at which point the second girl also stuck her middle finger up at me. Before I could get out of the car and give these two young punks a piece of my mind, the light changed and we all drove off.
Story 4 - I emptied the boy's diaper pail today. For the first time since he was born, emptying it made me come very close to vomiting. I don't think I need to describe to you how disgusting it is to empty a bag of another human's fecal matter, but this particular time was especially bad. That's all I'm going to say about it. Shudder
Story 5 - I drove out to Burger King to pick up some dinner for me and the wife. That's right, I was treating her to something special. Anyway, I happen to have put a fresh application of Rain-X on my windshield earlier. I was able to drive the 4 or 5 mile round trip to and from BK, through a fierce rainstorm, without once needing to use my windshield wipers. I love Rain-X.
Comments
cadiz12 said:
story five is a lie FOR SURE. your wife deserves better than burger king. nice try with the i'm-in-love-with-this-product ploy, though.
Troy said:
Either story 1 or story 5 is a lie, because it's sunny in story 1 and rainy in story 5. I'm guessing that story 5 is the lie because I find it hard to believe that anyone would drive 4 to 5 miles just to go to Burger King.
X said:
I'm guessing Story 3 is the lie, because since this incident, it's just not logical for anyone to flip the bird at Omar Phillips when the bird has already been flipped.
---X
mep said:
I call BS on story 5. There is NO WAY you drove the whole time without needing your windshield wipers. That's my guess. The bird is totally believable and so is the 60 degrees considering the wacked-out weather everyone is having.
Cate said:
I'm going to say Story #3 is the lie. When in doubt, go with the highest word count.
Katie said:
::sighs:: I think 5 is a lie too. What can I say, Burger King? I feel like you must have more manly class than that. Anyways, number one can't be a lie, because I have the exact kind of "the end times have come 60 degree weather." Two can't be false, because I'm certain that he emanates pimp... no gold chain required. And 3? Come on, I've been flipped off by a kid in a car seat. I have no comment for story number 4, don't know how you managed so long.
Glo said:
I'm goin' w/ #3, because we *all* know how much Omar likes to lay down the smack. No mere green light would stop his ire. ;)
Radioactive Diaper said:
My guess: #2. Can't even imagine your boy in public without his gold chains.
I said:
I don't want to post the answer too quickly, but I did want to say that there is plenty of interesting reasoning going on here.
seventeen syllables said:
Story #5 is a lie. Rain X lasts for 10 minutes on my windshield, and then it's just a smeary greasy windshield-wiper mess.
Sarah said:
I too am going with story #5. I don't really have a good reason for it.
cadiz12 said:
let's just remember who said it first. FIVE. all the way.
I said:
So, six votes for story 5, three votes for story 3. Then there's RaJ, with a vote for story 2 and my favorite reason of the bunch.
Though I hate to let the six of you down, story 5 is 100% true. cadiz, you're right. The wife does deserve better. But BK is all she got.
Troy - Welcome! There's a saying in my hometown: if you don't like the weather, wait 15 minutes. There was probably sun shining within an hour of when it started pouring. That's just the way it goes. And I totally went the 4 mile round trip to BK.
jasmine said:
i want number three to be a lie because otherwise, someone is raising some pretty nasty children.
but number 2 is suspiciously vague. you say he wasn't reprimanding any prostitutes, but dude, i'm figuring they were all there. just walking with you all like usual. so it's obvious he's a pimp with the prostitute harem in tow....but who dares talk to a pimp when he's not wearing his chains...
i'm going with number two.
I said:
The false story is:
story 4
Seriously, I thought I was giving it away with the "For the first time since he was born..." bit. Emptying that thing makes me want to vomit every single time I do it.
I expected to see more votes for #2. I'm glad people know my boy is, in fact, "the mac."
And I do love Rain-X.
Glo said:
We shoulda seen that one...live and learn, says I.
Shelby said:
Damn. I read the comments before I read the post (bad habit of mine). Oh well. It was a tough call though, since they all seem perfectly plausible (that is the game). You should have fingered those brats back. That would learn 'em!
seventeeen syllables said:
Dag-nabit. In hindsight, I see why #4 was a lie. But, I will respectfully disagree with you on Rain-X nonetheless.
Nia said:
Story number 2... who calls a baby that??
cadiz12 said:
next time at least go for panera.