"Did you poop?"
"Nuh."
"Really? Because you kind of stink. Are you sure you didn't poop?"
"Nuh."
"Oh, you're not sure. So it's possible that you pooped?"
"Noo."
"Well, I think we're going to check your diaper anyway, OK?"
"Nuh."
"Great, let's go!"

It has come to my attention that there are some out there who don't believe you should say "NO" to a child. Some think it breeds some kind of negativity. My apologies to any readers who subscribe to this theory, but I ask you, what kind of crap is that? How do you raise a kid without saying no? How do you spend 10 minutes with a kid without saying no? You don't, that's how.

There are others who don't mind saying no to their kids, but don't like for the kids to say no back. They see it as some sort of insubordination.

I'm all about the NO. I say "NO" like a pirate says "ahoy," which presumably, is all the time. It's a little known fact that Nancy Reagan actually got the idea for the "Just say no" campaign from me. We were in a room with some ad execs, and they were all like, "how about, 'Turn your back on drugs'?" And I was like, "Nancy, please just say no to these idiots." Then she was like, "Omar, that's brilliant! 'Just say no'!" I was like, "I no." (This is a much more noticeable pun when in writing, as I don't think Nancy got it when I said it to her.) And a campaign was born. Good times.

Anyway, I have no problems with no. If the boy is reaching for something dangerous, I'm not going to say, "look son, daddy's Ginsu knife collection could cut your tender baby skin, and daddy doesn't want you to get hurt." By the time I get all that nonsense out of my mouth, he'd be holding a knife in each hand, one in his mouth, and he'd be trying to curl his toes around a fourth. Instead, I let out a stern "NO." He stops, looks at me, then turns around and looks for some other trouble to get into.

And as many kids do, he's picked up his daddy's "NO" habit. He'll walk towards an electrical outlet, stick his hand out towards it, then say "NUH," pull his hand back, then walk away. It warms my heart.

Important Note: - In spite of his self-policing, I've been told that it is not OK to leave a child of his age at home alone.
There are so many times later in life when he's going to need to feel confident that he can say no. There will be drugs, alcohol, telemarketers or other salespeople, cults, recruiters from Ohio State, and so many others that he will need to be able to say no to. It is my responsibility as a parent to prepare him for that. He has to be comfortable with no. If that takes him telling his mom "nuh" when asked if he needs his diaper changed, that's fine with me.