Emergency Pie of the Month
There have been a lot of sleepless nights at the Phillips' house over the past week. Sure, there's been a lot keeping us busy, and the NHL finals, NBA finals, and Yankee games are keeping us up later than normal. But the main culprit is the key lime pie.
I've been haunted by the immense failure that was the key lime pie. I keep having this dream, where I'm part of an early 1900's comedy group. Essential to all comedy groups of the era was the old pie in the face gag. One of the other guys hits me in the face with a pie, and it's hilarious. Then I pick up my key lime pie and hit him in the face with it. But instead of gravity causing the pie tin to slide off to expose a highly dramatic yet pie-covered surprised face, it stays attached to his face. A few seconds later, he falls down, convulsing. Emergency crews come on scene and try to remove the pie from his face, but they are unable to because the pie is so sticky. Moments later, the guy is dead. Then the dream abruptly ends as I'm being handcuffed and taken away by officers with angry clown faces. See why I wasn't sleeping?
Anyway, I figured that the only way to shake this was to make a new pie. You can't dwell on failures, you have to power through. So I went to the library. Longtime readers with steel-trap memories will recall that I fear libraries. This should be an indication to you about how serious I was. I went to the library and I picked up a book called Joy of Cooking: All About Pies and Tarts. A little pie-making joy is exactly what I needed.
I decided to break the rule I created only days before, to not make a pie that I have never eaten before. I picked "Shoofly Pie," because it seemed simple and looked good. So I fastened the baby gates and went to work.

The wife came in when it was done, looked at it on the counter, and said that it was the "best looking pie (I) have made so far" (the photo doesn't do justice to the tasty look of the crumbly topping). And I know better than to misquote the wife, so you can believe that I'm not exaggerating. It was so nice looking, I didn't want to cut it. The pie sat there in all its glory for a couple of hours, as it cooled to room temperature (as per the instructions). I had considered charging admission to have people come in and look at it, maybe even allowing them to take pictures. Unfortunately, the boy was already in bed, and even a little extra cash isn't worth waking him up.
I'll stop here, and not fully go into how the pie tasted like I was drinking molasses. It was the best looking pie I've made so far. The nightmares have vanished, and generally speaking, all is right again.



Comments
Jon said:
And now my nightmares can end...
Lia said:
All right, give? What exactly is shoofly pie?
Glo said:
LOL! Between killing ppl with key lime pie and drinking molasses this may be the world's best-reading post so far today...
Jackie said:
If it tasted like you were drinking molasses.. then you made it right. shoofly pie is the SWEETEST pie ever. In my book it rates a double yuck. Way to go for redeeming yourself Omar - way to go!
Lianne said:
Food never tastes as good as it looks. Especially with the flies and such... crumbly topping notwithstanding.
cadiz12 said:
as long as you're getting your rest. it does look pretty tasty, though.
jasmine said:
i was just going to say, "gosh, that pie looks dark, what's in it?!"
hm...molasses...
elasticwaistbandlady said:
I grew up around Indiana Amish people. Shoofly pie is a staple food item for them.
This is probably the only guilty pleasure for a group who believe that zippers are the Devil's work.
Ree said:
I LOVE shoefly pie. Your topping looks divine. I'm drooling. Drooling. Drooling.
Katie said:
That pie is S-E-X-Y! Whoo!
girlspit said:
You've inspired me. Maybe it's because I haven't eaten today. I'm going to make a cobbler.
Cate said:
Dude, that is like the worst dream ever. Almost.
Becky
said:
you done good, son.
and you can pretty much pick anything out of that Joy of Cooking book series and have a winner. those people know what they're talking about. you can just about close your eyes, open the books at random, and point your finger at a recipe and it will be perfect.
i think it may be time for a new verification word. "patootie" has lost its novelty.
Nadia said:
Until I reread your post, I thought you made up the word "Shoofly", and I thought about how cool it must be to be you.
Now I know better.
Re: the verification word. I still like "patootie". Maybe you should just modify it to "sweet patootie". Revolutionize the process. Now it's wordS, and you are beyond cutting edge once more.
Syar said:
we all know its all about the looks.
and the molasses.
way to go, Omar.