I'm it
"Omigosh, did you see you got tagged on Glo's blog to do that "10 simple pleasures" meme thing?"
"Glo who? I don't know what you're talking about."
"Ha ha. Have you given any thought of who you're going to tag?"
"Nah, not really. I mean, Katie's an easy target, because she boldly claims that she does not do memes. Or maybe Cadiz, because she'd probably have good answers. But really, I love (1) breaking meme chains, so I probably won't tag anyone."
"Whatever. Well, if you're not giving any thought to this meme, why don't you go do some yardwork before it gets too hot outside? It may reach 90 today."
I liked that idea, so I went outside and started (2) mowing the lawn while (3) rocking to the beat of whatever song my iPod chose for me. Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw some sort of small creature dash underneath my deck as I approached with the mower. "Damn voles," I thought to myself. Then I made a mental note to put a trap outside after I finished mowing, so that I can continue my plan of (4) eradicating all rodents from my lawn.
After I finished mowing and putting out the trap, I went back inside. There's nothing like (5) drinking a cold glass of anything other than milk after mowing the lawn. I plopped myself down on the living room floor, turned on the tv, and started (6) watching SportsCenter while waiting for the boy to wake up from his nap. Of course, as I was laying there, I had my laptop perched on my belly, as I can't let too much time pass without (7) checking my email or (8) surfing blogs.
Several minutes later, I was pretty sure that I was (9) hearing the boy singing the ABCs in his crib, so I went to get him. As I was changing his diaper, the wife came in the room.
"It's hot outside," she said. "I'm making an executive decision. We're (10) going out for ice cream!"
Smiles and cheers filled the room. We got dressed, hopped in the car, and went and got some ice cream.
(I'll stop here. I'm lactose intolerant, so the story QUICKLY goes downhill from this point, anyway.)



Comments
scroobious said:
Very nicely done.
elasticwaistbandlady said:
I read all that only to be deprived of a happy ending? Bummer.
Becky
said:
you're gonna "do do" glo's meme? gross, expecially after the dairy...
I said:
There was a time when I liked you, Becky.
You and Sarah, from yesterday.
When I make a typo, the appropriate thing to do is send an email to omar@omarphillips.net and say, "hey omar, just an FYI. you made a typo."
The inappropriate thing to do is to post a comment and say, "hey jerk, you can't type."
Yes to email, no to publicly calling out my errors.
Becky
said:
i wasn't trying to correct you, i just wanted to type "do do" and giggle...
Katie said:
Does this mean I've been tagged? Because that's just tragic. The game ends with me. But besides that, I liked your list... ery clever.
And I'm lactose intolerant too!
I said:
Oh, ok. I'm back to liking you, then. I'm always up for a good poop joke.
Jon said:
Going out for ice cream always sounds like a good idea, but for the lactose intolerant, you might as well be going out for raw sewage.
Am I the only lactose intolerant person that is surrounded by people that can never, under any circumstances, seem to remember that I can’t do dairy? I don’t even think my parents remember most of the time… it’s a little disheartening.
Glo said:
Awesome. While no one knows who I am anymore...at least I gave the Internet this moment of true amusement.
Lianne said:
And the award for best undercover use of a meme is OMAR! (The crowd goes wild!!!)
Hey, isn't it about time for the Blog God Awards again? Or is Glo too busy performing PDA to do it again?
wendela said:
Yeah, very clever hiding of the fact you actually answered the questions and didn't do the first one on your list. Lactose intolerant: dairy-free gelato? Lact-aid? (There are loads of us out here in the same situation.)
cadiz12 said:
omar, flattery will get you a very long way.
well done, pal. and i agree, gelato is a fantastic non-dairy aftermowing snack. especially fragola (strawberry).
you know i love memes, so i'll get to this...eventually.
Syar said:
I heart your unique presentations of things. I was still blown away by the flash thingie you did, but this? this will have me awestruck for weeks.
Glo said:
OMIGOSH!!!
Lianne! You are OUT OF CONTROL!! Not only am I embarrassed in public but in the privacy of my own Internet!
LOL!!
Ok. Shame will now force me to *do a Blog God to prove I can occasionally practice some semblance of self-control.
*Pun intended
Lianne said:
PDA... duh, Glo. Personal Discourse on Awareness (I mean, rememer the name of your blog!)
I can't believe you would think I would stoop so low.
:)
Glo said:
LOL! Ok. I bow to Lianne's cleverness.
Cate said:
Genius. That's all I can say. Omar, you are a genius. And you've made my own pathetic meme list look even more pathetic. Thanks a ton.