No Bigfoot Sightings
This past weekend, I went camping. I had never gone camping before. You see, I love the outdoors like Hillary Clinton loves Monica Lewinski. I hate bugs. I fear wild animals. So the thought of staying outdoors for 2 days didn't seem so appealing. But, being the family man I claim to be, I had to go.
I thought I was going to have tales of Bigfoot sightings, or horror stories involving fire ants, wild monkeys, bears, and raccoons. I was certain I'd have several days of blogging material as a result of this trip. I expected to be able to share with you photos of me cowering in the front seat of our car by hour 3 of the trip.
Instead, much to my surprise, I ended up having an OK time. Sure, it wasn't "real" camping, as we slept in cabins with toilets and showers (though we did have to share the cabin with Brutus and dozens of his tiny 8-legged friends). But having not done it before, this is the only way I'd agree to it.
The most pleasant surprise was that for most of the weekend, I didn't know what time it was. As I sit here typing this blog post, only moving my eyes, I can see the time on the computer, cable box, VCR, and wall clock. It took me spending a couple of days without clocks to realize how much of a slave to the clock I have become. It was very liberating, in a cold, rainy, and insect-infested kind of way.
So, sorry to disappoint. No Bigfoot, no Omar cowering in the car. I do have a handful of photos, but not the blogging material I had hoped for. Maybe, in 29 years when I go camping again, I'll come back with some better stories.
Comments
cadiz12 said:
omar, i hate to break this to you, but this *camping* you did is less believable when you're including photos of a GAME ROOM. but maybe it was a good way to ease into it. camping is really fun and wonderful. just remember, brutus probably eats mosquitoes and anyone who contributes to the decline of mosquitoes is automatically my pal.
glad it was OK. hopefully next time it'll be fun.
very interested in seeing the photo entries. bet you weren't expecting 16, huh?
Glo said:
Yeah. I'm with Cadiz. You werent' camping. You were almost hoteling. I'm not even sure the bugs were camping.
Syar said:
yeah, that was how I *camped*. I was 8, and a product of middle aged parents too old for me and my boisterous want for activity.
can't say I didn't appreciate the hot showers.
I said:
But did you see that game room? Some of those games were from 20+ years ago! The conditions were primitive! (I'm told that it's common for camp grounds to have some kind of a rec room of some sort. It's not like the games were in my cabin, I had to "hike" to get there and be disappointed by the selection.)
Would it be more like real camping if I told you that I didn't actually use the shower?
Radioactive Warflea said:
Sorry, did Omar write "roughing it" somewhere and I missed it? No? Don't let the snobs get you down, Omar. Without question, you were camping. And well done at that. Anytime you lose track of time, you've "done good."
elasticwaistbandlady said:
Excellent. I hope this all natural outdoor version of you becomes a regular feature here to replace the sadly missed "Pie Of The Month" events.
I'm picturing it now, a remake of the Ernest movies starring you. "Omar Goes To Camp!" followed by "Omar Goes To Jail!", and "Omar Saves Christmas!"
X said:
I think the poll on the main page should be changed thus:
Did Omar go camping?
-Camping? With a game room? No
-No
-Oh, hell no
If you go "camping" and you have mains electricity and a game room, you can leave the quotation marks right there.
When I was a kid, I went camping with my dad, my older brother and his best friend. We were miles away from the nearest city, miles away from running water and miles away from any electricity or game rooms. That's camping.
---X
X said:
I hope this all natural outdoor version of you
I've seen far too many things on the internet to take that phrase as it was intended.
---X
I said:
camp |kamp|
noun 1: a place with temporary accommodations of huts, tents, or other structures, typically used by soldiers, refugees, prisoners, or travelers
a recreational institution providing facilities for outdoor activities, sports, crafts, and other special interests and typically featuring rustic overnight accommodations
verb [ intrans. ] live for a time in a camp, tent, or camper, as when on vacation
----
I lived for a time as a prisoner in rustic overnight accommodations. By definition, that qualifies as camping. Certainly not extreme hardcore live-off-the-land camping, but it is camping.
Jon said:
The true definition of camping has been long debated. Some think that you need to put a pack on your back, sleep on the ground or in a tent and not have any plumbing. While others think driving to a spot and sleeping inside a previously constructed shelter is camping. I don’t think anyone is wrong, but I think we’d be better served to give camping levels. Like, I’d say Omar is a level 1 camper. He’s out of his element, away from most modern things, but not that hard core. We’ll top the scale out at 5. A level 5 camper brings only a few essential tools into the wilderness. He hunts and gathers, he builds his own shelter and he probably doesn’t shave or bathe for several weeks. I’m about a 3 I’d say. I don’t hunt for my own food, but I do make sure I’m hiking several miles into the wilderness and I set up my own tent and sleep outside. And when I say that I do this, I mean that I did this back in high school. It’s been several years since I last made such a trip. But I do still occasionally take 6 or 7 mile day hikes. I own a CamelBak, which people make fun of me for, but then are actually very jealous when they realize that I have ice cold refreshment just inches away from my lips at all times. I grew up in a pretty strict household. When I used to go hiking in high school, my father would ask me where I was going. And I’d say, “I’m going hiking.” And he’d say, “When will you be back?” and I’d say, “I don’t know, around 3 AM?” and he’d say, “Ok, don’t get lost and take plenty of water.” My dad ruled with an iron fist. Needless to say, I always had enough water. Combined with the CamelBak, I’m almost impossible to dehydrate. Thanks dad.
Glo said:
Still no version of camping...rustic? Rustic does not have video games. It MAY have Monopoly with half the pieces missing - but that's the height of it.
Even the spider looks fat and happy.
Lianne said:
You camp like I camp. It's called "Mature Camping" and people who like to squat in the woods are just lower life forms.
Excellent photos, beautiful place.
Lia said:
This is no where near camping. Camping, by my definition, involves portable accomodations that you port yourself.
And by the way, he's so not a Brutus.
jasmine said:
okay, X's comment about the new poll had me laughing, out loud, for several minutes.
thanks X.
i hate bugs.
cadiz12 said:
hope the emergency of sorts turned out for the best and that all are ok.
Lanna Lee Maheux-Quinn
said:
dude, you know a baby must crawl before he walks, and you must camp in a cabin before you can go tenting. Or something like that.
Speaking of pie, (I know you weren't speaking of pie, but I am too lazy to go back to one of your older posts) John Scalzi of the Whatever made some Schadenfreude Pie http://www.scalzi.com/whatever/004492.html, Do you think you could make one? (Notice the thinly veiled challenge there...)
Bethany said:
I went camping with Lianne and her family once, and they had a mattress for me to sleep on in my tent -- a real mattress, not a wimpy air mattress-camping pad deal-- that's my kind of camping!! (Actually, I no longer camp at all -- as a friend of mine says, if you can't do it in high heels, don't do it.)