Learning life lessons is Elefun
For his birthday, the wife and I purchased the game Elefun for the boy. I may have mentioned before that he likes elephants, and what kid doesn't like fun? So it seemed like a perfect fit.
And it turns out that it has been, as he greatly enjoys playing the game. For those unfamiliar with the game, there is an elephant with a fan inside, and the fan blows little paper "butterflies" up through the trunk and into the air. Each player holds a net, and the object of the game is to catch as many butterflies as you can.
The unexpected thing is that I also enjoy the game. I enjoy it, primarily, because I have won 100% of the time I played it. It's natural to enjoy doing things that bring you success. Some might think that I should be ashamed of myself for bragging about beating a two-year old at a game of catching paper butterflies, or for gently pushing him out of the way to catch that 19th butterfly to beat the house record (previously also held by me).
To those people, I say that you clearly don't know what it takes to raise a champion. Charles Jeter, he never let his son Derek win at anything. Derek now makes in excess of $20 million per year, plus endorsements. Earl Woods didn't give Tiger any free passes, and Tiger now is a skillionaire, and I have a man-crush on him (I feel comfortable saying that because thousands of other straight men also have man-crushes on Tiger). William Gates Jr. probably never played Elefun with his son Bill, but I bet that if he had, he wouldn't have let Bill catch a single one.
My point is that I'm teaching my boy to earn his victories. I'm making him tougher. In turn, he'll parlay that toughness into millions and millions of dollars, with which I will retire.
My secondary point is to brag about that new house record I set.



Comments
Rhonda said:
That game looks like a lot of fun! I can see why it makes you want to mercilessly win over a small, impressionable, and delicate child when you play.
Viking said:
I'm not sure I can take your word on that house record... Two year olds can't exactly verify a count of anything more than "this many."
Becky said:
wow. i wish my parents had taught me lessons like that. maybe i wouldn't be so underpaid now. all those undeserved "candy land" victories really came with a price. i could have been a brazillionaire.
Seventeen Syllables said:
Too bad elefun doesn't have an electronic record of high scores like Pac Man and Space Invaders. My brother and I spent years engaged in a battle to replace each other's initials on the 'top ten' list. I still think that whoever got the most high scores on Atari games was Mom's favorite.
Lianne said:
Re: Man Crush
I understand that a man is only allowed 3 man crushed in his life, whereas a woman can have unlimited number of girl-crushes. (Mostly because men think it's hot).
I think having a man-crush on Tiger is absolutely acceptable.
But who are the other two?
jazzy said:
so i want pictures of this game. i'm very intrigued. can you take some and e-mail them over?
i think i might add this to my christmas list...
Jon said:
I verified these numbers with the Elias Sports Bureau. They are legit. The O.P.H. (Omar Phillips Household) record is, in fact, held by Omar Phillips. He meets the required 3 & UP specifications. His son, however, is not currently eligible for any record book entries due to his 2 year old designation and it’s to my understanding that Omar is currently under investigation by the F.E.G.C. (Fair Elefun Gaming Committee) for age tampering in order to set that record. So there is an asterisks next to it.
I’m just reporting the facts.
Lia said:
Excellent parenting philosophy. That boy is going to grow up to make us all proud.
Also, I tagged you.
glo said:
Sad. Just sad.
cadiz12 said:
if someone else has to hold back in order for you to win, it's not a real victory.
good for you for teaching the boy about real life from the start. but parents have about fifty-fifty odds that the whole high expectation thing will work out well.
tiger rocks.
elasticwaistbandlady said:
I just had to run and put on my cheerleading outfit (for 'plus' sized women), and now I'm forming the very first Elefun cheer squad known to man.
O to the M to the A to the R. What does that spell? O-M-A-R!!! Yayyyyy. *lots of somersaults and heiny slaps here because I can't do any flips*
I'll just make sure to stay clear of the Republican Conventio0n in my Elfun logo outfit lest they think that I'm cheering for them.
Nadia said:
Ah, Omar. You do me proud.
Soon, the "gently" will be no more.
Syar said:
And soon we'll be seeing him catching those paper butterflies in the Olympics. *tears up a little*